Discovering Your True Self

334862_10150491743619478_522211963_oIt’s that feeling-it’s late at night and the dreaded morning is fast approaching. You’re slaving over things you don’t want to do. Here’s what happens to me: I start thinking to myself, “what am I doing here? Why am I stuck in this pattern and can’t seem to get out?” It makes me wonder, is it worth it in the long run. When you feel pressured from teachers, bosses, and coworkers to live up to their standards, their moral codes for your life, doesn’t it make you wonder if it’s even worth it? I certainly think about it.If you feel that the institutionalized culture of western society has control over you, it’s time to step back and think about what you’re doing and to reconsider your life seriously. The constant pressures of the corporate culture, media, capitalism, post-modern individuality, and “living the good life” have all been turned against us in a distorted fashion. Consequentially, they have stopped our hearts from growing toward one another and it has led us to divide; neighbors don’t know each other, spouses get divorced half the time, you grow up getting bullied or teased because the bully’s dad owns a ferrari and yours doesn’t, the government shuts down because of bipartisan splits…The list is virtually endless. Ideology in our country has gone from a personal belief system to something that gets imposed on others, and if people aren’t receptive, then they must be morally inferior and not worth your time.
To release the pressure, we seek out all sorts of distractions, and this is where our true self gets lost. These come in many forms, from something as exotic as vacations to Hawaii to something as simple as an hour of scrolling your facebook news feed at work with that glazed look in your eye without really reading the contents. Nevertheless, I write this so that you may have an idea of how to get your self back, and this insight comes from my own experiences, so you can take it or leave it, but I really do hope its helpful in some way.If you ever find yourself feeling like you’re losing control of your life, or you find yourself falling in your dreams, then I want to remind you of something you already know but it’s been buried by all the junk that our culture clutters us with so that we can’t think straight (such as the notion that having more money will buy you happiness, or that if you just take this one pill, you’ll be happier than ever!…) Remember that you are always in full control of your body, mind, and soul. Don’t let anyone, even a loved one, take that away from you. At the end of the day, when you strip the world of all its institutionalized insanity, you’re only left with the beating heart, the creative mind, and the energetic driving spirit to move you in any direction you want to go. In order to unleash these, there is one skill you must learn at all costs: tune out the nay-sayers in your life who think that you’re wasting your time following your dreams. Here’s the kicker: the biggest nay-sayer in your life is you-your doubts and insecurities. You will shut yourself down faster than anyone else at all costs if you so much as even stray from the path of comfort and familiarity. If you’re stuck in a rut, and you want to quite literally renew your self, then your brain will work against you to stay in its comfort zone.
Tune it out. Your brain is entrapping your heart, spirit and mind because it’s become used to the conditioning of society. You may have heard people say things such as, “But I don’t want to to quit my job because I make good money” or “why would you want to be a writer? They get paid shit” or “being a painter isn’t a REAL job like engineering or something like that”. This list is also virtually endless.The the only way to let your heart free from its imprisonment is to shut your brain up. Turn the volume down by breathing deep and finding solace in your own courage. A bird cannot know its natural home while in the cage. Likewise, you cannot know your true home, which is your heart, mind, and spirit and all their longings, while in your own made up cage of comfort. I’m convinced that we’ve tricked ourselves that we have it all, but I know we don’t. We’re nowhere near close to what we could be if we let go of our own trappings. Yet despite this, I know we can reach our true potential, even in our reality where 2% of people own 98% of the wealth, where medical care is lacking for people globally and domestically, where government shutdowns occur based on ideological principles, where God is the most misunderstood figure in the most purported “christian” country that is the United States, where people criticize you for following your dreams because they’re “unrealistic and childish” and you need to “grow up and do the respectable thing”. Fuck that, and fuck this negativity. Be grateful for every breath you’ve been rightfully given! Be the person you want to be, not who your parents or your bosses or your teachers want you to be. Be strong, take the hits that come with pursuing your dream because there will be many. You will be ridiculed, you will feel panicky and anxious and scared because of the insecurity. But this is worth taking because through all that, you can say with conviction that you lived YOUR life, no one else did it for you! It doesn’t matter how you do it (I personally rely heavily on God for guidance and help everyday, and I would recommend you try it too-He’s pretty freaking reliable. But I digress). The only thing that’s going to get you through all of this is your drive to pursue what’s meaningful to you! By being yourself without undue comparison against others you will invariably make the world a better place because you will be TRULY happy, without the pills and without the bullshit we call materialism. And you know? Happiness is contagious, so when you love yourself, you will be able to fully love others, and this is what makes the world go round underneath all the evil.
Do whatever you have to do to shut yourself and the nay-sayers up and listen to your heart! You do what you want with your trinity of ultimate power because it is the most important thing you’ll ever have. To live a life without integrating your mind, body, and spirit is no life at all. A bird will never learn to fly if trapped in its cage, but you know what? You’ve had the key to yours all along-you just have to summon the courage to open up the cage and learn how to fly. At the end of the day, you will swell up with joy when you see that despite your broken wings, you’ve learned the joys of freedom and you lived your life to the full.
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